Wait....married women too?

7:24 PM 6 Comments A+ a-


Hallos lovies, my sincere apologies for slacking off, as in major major slacking off. I really don’t have an excuse really. I always come across juicy, mouth open gist, some are even down right ratched sef and I’ve been keeping them to bestos and myself. Selfish much aint it? Make una no vex abeg. I’ll try to keep getting better at bringing some funny yarns but until then please keep me in your prayers. LOL…

So last night I was talking to my friend *Deolu (name changed for privacy reasons) and we ended up talking for about 2.5 hours. I know right!! A whole 2.5hrs yarning on the phone!! Lol… my friends know there’s never a boring moment with me except I’m really shy, like I’m around someone I have a major crush on……cough…cough… e.g Mr.Q. loll okay let me stop.
Deolu and I are old friends. Actually an old toaster who was introduced to me by one of my many non-biological aunties when we were having our “iwo omo yi, lo marry now ahn ahn… mo fe plan wedding o.” Translation “you this girl, go an marry now ahn..ahn..I want to plan a wedding”. So aunty *Mopelola had tried to match make Deolu and I, & as usual once I saw a red flag the first couple of dates I ran 440 and friend zoned him sharp sharp.

Deolu and I haven’t spoken in months (that’s another story entirely…. my lips almost got raped & I had to slap some sense into him so he could regain his sanity cos obviously he must have lost it- for him to think he can plant one on me without my permission or approval. Deolu shay you were smoking weed that day abi??? Mchewwww…nonsense. Anyhow, he has since apologized & promised not to step out of line till he’s 90 years old. I don’t trust that boy sef so I’ ain’t gonna be hanging with him alone. My lips are very precious to me thank you! Just ‘cos they are all pink & orishirishi don’t mean they are available just anyhow. Nonsense again.

Okay, back to the story, so Deolu & I were catching up, he’s been calling since my birthday to catch up (wait ooo, I’m beginning to think this boy is up to something sef. Why is he calling this much? Got to think about that one); that’s how we got talking about dating & marriage and what not. Deolu has always acted like committed relationships & marriage are like leprosy. He’s very anti-commitment. Somewhere along the gist he said “Savannah, there’s a reason I’m the happiest among all my friends (May I interject that Deolu & his clique of friends are very successful (career & business) men so I was a bit surprised to hear that this group of men not so happy. I asked why and he said because they are all married. Mcheww, this boy has come again with his anti-marriage wahala. He couldn’t delve into the plethora of marital issues the boys were having but he said that his advice to all of them is “you should have remained single & just screw around like I do”. I was like ahh Deolu ooo but why would you give anyone such an advice? He says because it’s true. This guy now goes on to tell me he has messed around with single girls, engaged girls, married girls & pregnant girls (No, not pregnant for him). At this point I had nearly fainted on my comfy couch. Cheii..mogbe…boy yi o ni pa mi o. Say what now?? Pregnant women? Married women too? He said ahn ahn…. He has been chased by dogs and husbands…Lmaoooo…I can’t stop laughing every time I remember this. Omg!

I had to ask why the married women though and the pregnant women too? In all fairness he said none of the pregnant ones were naija (Sigh of relief…there is still hope for my country). He said the married ones were bored with their husbands and the whole marriage thing.  I also had to chide him for letting married women get into his pool of potential trysts but he was like “Savannah, I promise you every single one of these girls came after me on their own and they border line stalked him & since “NO” is not in his dictionary when it comes to the nitty gritty….”. Gone are those days when married women just folded their arms and sulked while their husbands have a spree of girls outside.

By now you know I’m sitting up and enjoying this conversation. I’m like ehen…oya continue. Deolu goes on to say he’s friends with all of these girls and they don’t want to leave the security blanket of their marriage but they get off some kind of high knowing they can play games behind their husband & he doesn’t suspect a thing, yet he thinks he’s the only one having a ball with all dem girls outside. Just the thrill of spending more time in the toilet texting him, meeting up at his house for an afternoon rendezvous in the sheets, and even sneaking off to a car when they meet at a party is enough to get the girls hooked. So now that he has been there done that with the married ones he’s even more convinced that there is no more sanctity in marriage & he wants no part of it.

He definitely said more but the little about married women got me thinking quite a bit because I have come across a situation where a babe married her husband a virgin but she has had many more partners after she got married because her husband was not exciting.

So my thoughts are thus: Is there anything that can be done to prevent a married woman from having a boyfriend or a lover? (I know we are now all about what’s good for the goose is good for the gander) but a part of me still finds it’s unnatural & unsettling to deem it okay.

Is it a woman’s responsibility to shake things up between the sheets & in her marriage in general, and what role should a man play in all this? Honestly, if you are a 3 pumps & I’m done – so my wife should be done too kind of man, I can’t blame your wife if she has a lover. What’s wrong with you sef? 3 humps & that’s it???

Loll… Have a fun weekend y’all

 **** Names changed for privacy




Love is a beautiful thing………………………………

6 comments

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Anonymous
AUTHOR
October 23, 2014 at 9:20 AM delete

Ok... this is crazy! First of all, I'm a married woman and yeah things might not always go rosy like in the movies because duh... marriage is serious work on both sides! a man or woman that steps out of the marriage just because things are not going well in the marriage is just pure wrong! What happened to for better for worse and communication? If you're not happy in the marriage... my dear, you are responsible for your own happiness... you don't have to cheat on your spouse to get the thrill of happiness, go look for a productive hobby like blogging, skiing, yoga, cooking, reading, go back to school if need be... It is the responsibility of both partners to put in their 100% to make the marriage work. I would think you guys didn't get married because of great sex only... there must have been other things besides beauty that attracted you to each other. And as for your coded friend... he will soon find that Mrs. Right that will drive him totally madly in love to marry her and boyfriend... karma is a bi...

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Anonymous
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October 23, 2014 at 9:41 AM delete

omg! my friend just sent this blog to me. I love your stories. They are funny. I am going to start following.

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Anonymous
AUTHOR
October 23, 2014 at 9:43 AM delete

Men! Deolu is such a dog really. Can't he just turn the married women & pregnant women down.
I'm not married so I don't know what it is like but I do know I won't be cheating on my future husband.

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Anonymous
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October 23, 2014 at 11:39 PM delete

Did you ever give any feedback to your "auntie"? You woulda been one of Deolu's trophies if not for God... lol

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Anonymous
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October 25, 2014 at 12:42 PM delete

Loll 3 humps!!!

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Anonymous
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October 25, 2014 at 1:13 PM delete

Dis was so funny. I think you should tk ur wrtn serz

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